Sivut

7/13/2012

You Are Beautiful

Haha, I just had to share this photo.

By any means, I'm not trying to sound selfish, but my skin looks so flawless!!!! My skin has always been really bad, I have some acne scarring and only now it has been in such a condition that I don't have to be ashamed of my facial skin. (Let's face it, bad skin can make one insecure.)

As a background info, I went thorough some facial treatments and tried different products (also ones that you can only have if you go to see doctor), but nothing was THE ONE for me.

AND NOW; 


I mean, my face has been looking like this for a while now, but I was still really surprised as I saw the picture. The pose is horrible, but I can't stop staring at my cheek! xDDD
I SWEAR I HAVEN'T DONE ANY PHOTOSHOPPING FOR MY SKIN! You can even see my eye wrinkles and some spots on my forehead (not to mention my nose). There's no that plastic feel, you know. :DD

***

Yesterday I took my foundation off , but let only mascara on. Little bit later I walked pass the mirror and was like: "Do I still have my makeup on???" :DDD And I meant the FOUNDATION!
It was so weird situation for me, 'cause something like year ago I couldn't stand to look at myself from the mirror without foundation and now I went out wearing only mascara....

***

Yeah, the thing I said not being able to look at myself from the mirror... it's sad, I know. :/
I was terribly insecure and also shy because of my skin problems. I mean, I'm naturally shy, but at this point I was overly scared someone would judge me or something.
And I KNOW, it's silly! :)
I have built up my confidence since these 'bad days', but still I have those unsure moments time to time.
Having said that, these unsure moments are now even more silly and so unnecessary, 'cause if I have e.g really dry lips or a red mark on my face, I can crack to think these stupid "what if" questions. (they are so stupid, I won't even mention any). 
NO ONE WILL CARE IF I HAVE A RED SPOT ON MY FACE: THE SPOT WON'T AFFECT TO MY PERSONALITY!
***
I don't know, these are the things I have been living with for too long. For too long I felt unsure about myself.
I feel kind of awful to say this, but it took lot of guts for me to apply to the Cosmetician school and to the beauty industry, because I actually at some point had thought that I'm not good enough for the beauty industry. I'm not beautiful enough...
Argh, I can't believe I felt that way. :(
Couple weeks ago this one person said to me; "You are beautiful. Even without makeup."
(Made me very happy, but I don't think the person even relizes how happy, 'cause I... never told anyone how I felt.)
This post started as a meaningless mumble, but now I really want to say to you all;
You are all beautiful. Nobody is perfect - flaws make us human beings.
.... I'm now crying here as I write this.
I don't beg your pity - I never did since I never spoke to anyone...
So please don't feel too bad for me, I don't want to upset you.
I'm now stronger person, I feel like I have beat my demons - I survived.
But if there's anyone that have same kind of feelings, feel free to write to me if you want. :)
(I could write many pages from this subject, but I won't... and my brains are scrumble right now, 'cause it's sooooo late again! :'D)
Wish a happy and beautiful day to you all! <3

btw, I'm starting to be better at filling my brows! ;)
(They are reallyhard to define, since I have that Finnish hair/brow color.... ash blond. On top of that my brows are really thin and almost rounded shape. Yes, I'm stereotypical Finnish person; golden blond hair and sparkly blue eyes. hahah xD)

3 comments:

  1. Hey! I am your new follower! =)
    I really like your blog and I found it through Nikki's Blog!

    You look gorgeous in that picture and your looks that you have created are super!

    xoxo
    Madiha

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    Replies
    1. Hello there! :)
      Thank you for your kind words and big welcome as a new follower!

      xoxo
      Riina

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